Coward!

My Dad hasn't spoken to me in precisely - A Week. It was  around this time last saturday-when he spoke to me last. He's been ignoring my phone calls throughout the week. He just called me: to ask me about the basketball game and who won.?

Some dance to remember, some dance to forget.!

Friends silhouetted, originally uploaded by Mojo....

Beautiful friend,
You are not fine. You keep lying to the world and yourself. He may not know how much damage he actually did to you. But I know. I know the constant fear you live in. The way your always ready to protect yourself. The way your no longer calm, but constantly on the edge when your around men. The way you don't like hugs anymore, or anyone getting too close to you. The way you shutter when any man looks at you as if he wants to devour you. I know why you always choose the same type of guys. Ones that will have the power to hurt you. I don't blame you, because- You don't know any better.

Dear friend,
I can't tell you that things will go back to the way they used to be. Because for sure they won't. He did something to permanently change you. I'm sorry friend, for the way he treated you, for the marks-tempoorary n permanent that he left on you. I aplogize for him never taking the chance to see your beauty, your strength, your wisdom. But trust me friend- you are strong, you are intelligent, you are beautiful. And friend you don't have to worry about a thing-cuz i'll never let him get to you again. Ill never let any other man ever bring you down that low. Friend- you'll always have a space with me. You are always welcome here-ur safe place- where no one can ever get to you. The least I can do- is promise you that much-throughout our lifespan together.

Sincerely, Rain

Everytime it rains at night with the cool, wind breeze-like it is now. It reminds me of this feeling, this one memory-but i can never put my hands on it. Its a distant feeling, but it brushes up on my nostrils and triggers at my mind as if its right in front of me.

So i find myself sitting in my car-windows down, listening to the drops of rain and the gusts of wind, enjoying, exploring my memories, and letting the rain seep in to me.

Best friend...

Just when i'm about to give up on you. I remember stupid little things that only i know. That no one else-would ever think of. Like the way- your heart beats, when your nervous; How your eyes aren't really blue, but instead this grayish, blue-and how they change depending on your mood. Like how Brown is your favorite color, but you look best in lighter colors. Like what your favorite girl name is. and how you talk in your sleep. Or how your the sweetest right before your about to fall asleep. Or how when your rude- its either because someone pissed you off, or your hungry. And mostly how, you act tough- when your actually the sweetest guy Ive ever met-who is just broken, and not fully repaired yet.

The list goes on.. And then thats when i decide- you know what? im gonna give this another shot. im gonna continue to be kind to you, even when you are not. How i know-deep inside- you'll always come around. Deep inside- its all a front. And i know you well enough-to know this. Sooo, i go back to not giving up. Cuz your worth something more than that. You deserve someone to not walk out on you-no matter how far you push them out. Ill always be right in front of the door, whether it be shut, or your ready to open it. This i promise you....because its not in me to be selfish.!*

Some days are like dreams. Beautiful dreams, that u just want to hold on to. But they're even better when they're waking dreams. You know those that u can clearly dream up n see while ur sitting bored at work. Now-those-have no comparison. And yeah, i had one of those yesterday. Pretty cool. And defintely got me through work. I sat there replaying my waking dream. So here's how it went.....

Me n my dear friend Fadumo are dancing our hearts out, in the middle of nowhere. I have long hair all the way down to my waist n i keep shaking it around, till everything around me is spinning. But i am not dizzy, im just high off of life n im smiling. Dancing, dancing, jumping to this particular--song. I <3 days like this. when my imagination and my life are in sync. Both happiness.!*

----"I am enough of an artist to draw freely upon my imagination. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world."—Albert Einstein

It's All Relative.

2, originally uploaded by tukseedoh.

The stories we hear. The mixed feelings we have. Our day to day thoughts. The people that grace our lives. The smiles from rays of sunshine or droplets of rain. These and many more: Are all relative. If not to ourselves, surely to others. Yet we miss it, or choose to forget. But if anything: it starts with words(whether out loud or in thoughts) that form mere sentences.

When strangers became lovers. And fathers became mothers. And your smile became my heart. And i became a part of you.

And then tears became a cleansing of Beautiful.

When letters came empty and tears drew droughts.

When talking turned into yelling and Husbands beat mothers.

When my silence turned into your promises.

When backpacks became heavy and you became a distance; When bags became heavy and you became a journey.

When sisters became just neighbors and boys became sensitive.

He followed her to Dubai, as she honeymooned in Sweden.

My mother broke my trust as he broke my dignity. My mother broke my heart after he broke my ribs. My mother silenced me as he lied to her.

She became me as I longed to be her.

Listen- I can no longer hold you.

In the still of the night- her voice brings death to me.

The day breathing became simple was the day flying became suffocating.

Will you remember me, as their giggling at you?

You forced her till she bled. Your pride gave you a broken heart. She smelt roses off your lips. Her cry moved mountains. And just the simple gentle touch of her neck, sent static trickles down your back.

She was cold, your words kept her warm.

When they didn't have phones and walking didn't seem so far.

When eating became a crime, and toilets bore love stories.

As he saw Faith and Desire on the swing of her hips.

>>>>>These thoughts may have nothing to do with each other. But in a way they're all relative to me. A quiet night in bed, tossing and turning to fall asleep before a long day's work, yet- all that happened was one random thought after the other circling in my head- so what do you do? But record these precious moments- for one day you may look back n be astonished.

Quote of the Day.!*

Today’s mighty oak is just yesterday’s nut that held its ground..